It’s been rough, hasn’t it?
You’ve tried to manage your painful memories, and all the other things that trouble you, but you haven’t been able to figure out how to do that, or how to make yourself feel better. You’re used to taking care of things yourself, so it’s hard to accept when what you’re doing isn’t working.
Ironically, the one thing that might help you feel a lot better happens to be the hardest thing to manage along with PTSD symptoms or trauma stress–a relationship. Whether it is your marriage, a partnership or a good friend, your trauma experience and the results of it that you live with daily can make being in a relationship extremely difficult, if not unbearable.
But being alone with your thoughts is nobody’s idea of a picnic. In fact, one of your biggest problems in a relationship is due to the fact that you don’t want to make your partner suffer from your thoughts like you do. One of you is bad enough, you certainly aren’t going to share the monsters with someone you love.
But it really is a case of damned if you do and damned if you don’t. You know your partner has a right to expect you’ll be open and honest about what’s going on with you. Sometimes, though, it’s everything you can do just to hold it together. Sometimes you just don’t have any energy left over to relate to anyone.
Are You a Trauma Survivor? A Message from Me to You
Maybe you’ve been thinking about counseling or some other way to make yourself feel better. To try to participate in your relationship or your family. Or in any kind of relationship, even just a friend or a buddy. Or maybe you’ve just been trying to avoid the pain––after all, a person can only handle so much and still maintain. And you’ve been handling more, and for longer, than you ever thought you would.
So what’s the answer? What are you supposed to do to take care of those you love and not get overwhelmed yourself? Chances are, you’ve had times where the best you could do was to take yourself away from everyone until you regained some kind of control.
But here’s the thing: you deserve a chance to have a meaningful and successful relationship–to have someone you can care for and who can care for you. That might seem impossible from where you’re sitting at this moment, but that doesn’t change the truth of it–that you deserve to love and be loved regardless of what happened to you in the past.
Something has led you to these words, and whatever it was, I’m glad it did. What I know is that each new chapter in a person’s life starts at a time when you most need it. It is usually marked by some event that is meaningful only to you.
It’s true that no one can know what you go through. Even someone who has experiences similar to yours can’t know what it means to you, personally. I’d be the last person to say, “I know how you feel.” I don’t even think it. But here you are and here I am. And what I do know is that you need a hand with what you’re going through.
I happen to know that the experience of trauma of any kind can greatly impact a person’s ability to relate to another human being on an intimate level–for all the reasons mentioned above, and more.
I specialize in relationships but I also specialize in trauma recovery, too, precisely because I kept running into people like you–who were having relationship problems because of trauma. I’d really like you to call me so we can talk about whether I might offer something that would be helpful to you. (By the way, if you’re a vet I’d like you to know up front that I’m not. However, I did grow up in the military as an Army brat, so I’m not 100% clueless.)
Call me at 415-710-6615. If it sounds like working together on this a possibility, we can set up a meeting to talk more about what you need and how I work. FYI: You don’t need to go into too much on the phone. You are always in control of how much you info you share, and I don’t expect anything else. There’s more info below, if you’re interested.
PTSD and Cognitive Processing Therapy, EMDR and Stress Reduction Techniques
If you’ve taken the time to read this, chances are you’re maybe thinking about moving forward. You’ve been looking for a way to do it and maybe you’ve found one. I support you moving as slow as you need to, but by the same token, you’ll never know unless you call so we can talk. That’s just reality.
As a part of my work with those who have a history of trauma, I utilize Cognitive Processing Therapy and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing). They are two of the main methods for dealing with PTSD and Traumatic Stress. There is another method that is used (called Prolonged Exposure or PE), but in my opinion I believe it is too much and too painful, so I don’t use it.
I can support and assist you to find your own, unique way to close out this old chapter of your life and open a new one—one filled with hope and anticipation. Wouldn’t that feel great for a change?
I’d like you to call me personally so we can see whether I can offer something that’s right for you at this time. Maybe some Stress Reduction Techniques would be helpful. Let’s find out. Call my cell at (415) 710-6615. Call me today while you are thinking about it.
If you want to know more about PTSD and Traumatic Stress, see the other offerings on this site under the More Good Stuff For You tab, or go to the National Center for PTSD at http://www.ptsd.va.gov. There is a lot of stuff for vets there, but there is info for other trauma sufferers as well.